Coworkers Don’t Like Me Because I’m Quiet: What to Do


coworkers don't like me because i'm quiet

Being a quiet person in the workplace can be difficult. It often feels like those that are the most vocal get the most attention and accolades.

And it can sometimes even feel like your coworkers may not like you because you are quiet. 

But is that really true? Is there anything wrong with being a quiet person at work? And should you try to speak up more if you are on the quieter side at work?

We unpack all of those questions and more in the article. All recommendations are provided by recognized career experts that contributed their points of view to this article.

Let’s dive in.

Is It Bad to Be a Quiet Person at Work?

can an employer give a bad reference

Many emerging leaders think it’s bad to be a quiet person at work, but I think differently. During more than 2 decades in my career, I have seen all sorts of leaders: the quiet ones, the articulate, the unpredictable, the rogue ones, etc. Those good leaders, no matter their personalities, had one thing in common: they were experts in their fields who brought value to their teams and corporations.

They were liked because they were trusted, not because they were outspoken. If you are quiet, don’t be discouraged. I’ve seen many quiet leaders gain the reputation that they were quiet, but when spoke, they would rock everyone’s world with so much value they brought. People like what they know and trust. So get out there and mingle with your coworkers, even if you don’t talk much. Get them to know and trust you.

The above content was provided by Taty Fittipaldi, Founder, Coaching Expatriates.

Do Bosses Like Quiet People at Work?

bad performance review

Bosses appreciate employees based on their contributions, work ethic, and professionalism. While some managers might value outspokenness and assertiveness, others might appreciate the calm, thoughtful demeanor of quieter individuals. It’s less about volume and more about the quality of input and performance.

The above content was provided by Nate Djeric, Career Counselor, Career Boost.

Why Do I Feel Like My Colleagues Don’t Like Me Because I’m Quiet?

thinking person

Sometimes, people who are quiet are seen as aloof or unfriendly. If you think your quietness is being mis-interpreted this way, consider your body language and how you present yourself in the workplace. You don’t necessarily need to start talking around the water cooler—a simple exchange of smiles and waves in the hall can do a lot to make you seem more approachable.

Make sure you’re not misinterpreting your coworkers’ actions, too. If they don’t talk to you or invite you to social outings, it could be that they’re trying to respect your boundaries or think you’re not interested in socializing at all.

The above content was provided by Matt Erhard, Managing Partner, Summit Search Group.

Should I Speak Up More at Work?

customer meeting

Yes and no. When you are completely fine with you being quiet, there is no need to change. For example: you are fine with where you want to be in your career, you have the social circle you want to have. In short, you are mostly happy.

However, when you feel like your life should be different, or other people around you should act differently, there is reason to learn how to speak up. It makes sense to learn the skills that you haven’t developed yet to become an all-round communicator. You don’t have to change who you are, or how you view yourself, you only have to learn skills to speak up in situations it works for you to speak up. For example, in situations where it makes sense to confront others’ behaviors, so that your boundaries will be clear, and respected.

The above content was provided by Hanne Wulp, Executive Coach, Communication Wise.


When it comes to work, quality is generally more important than quantity. That comes with the work itself, as well as your interactions with others. 

So, there is nothing wrong at all with being a quiet person at work. Just make sure you’re putting forth your best effort and delivering consistent quality at the office.

About the author

Dan Slocum

Dan is the founder of Best Fit Work and is a business professional with over 10 years of experience. He has been a hiring and people manager on multiple occasions, and has also gone through the hiring process himself at a variety of different companies. Dan writes to share content, tools, and resources to help people discover and thrive in their own best fit work.

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